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Thread: Some of my Poetry. Completed or works in Progress.

  1. #1
    Gold Member donBenito's Avatar
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    Default Some of my Poetry. Completed or works in Progress.

    let me know what u guys think...
    Last edited by donBenito; 05-31-2015 at 02:37 AM.

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    Gold Member cribby1983's Avatar
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    Both are beautiful, DonBenito!

    Keep it simple, exactly! The more you write the more your style will develope.

    I do it a little differently. But thats due to the fact that English isnt my first language. I think in German language and translate it while writing it down.
    Writing a verse every day, keeps the psychologist away.

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    I like it. It's very pure in its essence. You will find that your earlier works, though they might look more primitive to you, they are closer to the heart,

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    Forever Eternal Premo's Avatar
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    Love the work! Keep on writing, I say.

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    Gold Member donBenito's Avatar
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    Thanks for the compliments and the advice. I'm gonna keep on going.

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    Gold Member cribby1983's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by donBenito View Post
    Lukewarm

    When he kissed her
    she did not know
    that her lips were
    the first that
    his had ever known.

    When he touched her
    and a warmth passed his way
    her body was not aware
    of the true length of time
    his had spent empty and alone.

    A life as cold as winter
    a mind such as this one
    full of the love of spring
    and desires unfulfilled.

    Disabled or withdrawn
    due to mysterious and cruel curses
    or seasons out of order.

    If love exists and God understands
    this devious and deserted spell
    could not last much longer.

    Since with each passing hour
    of every day and night of every year.
    His cold and abandoned body
    was slowly getting older.


    This one is awesome DonBenito... wow... I love it
    Writing a verse every day, keeps the psychologist away.

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    2 Corinthians 5:7
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    "As my eyes
    serve their duty
    to see what cannot always be seen
    As my mind
    acknowledges your pain, your purpose
    and aides to redeem your sacrifice"

    I really liked those lines, flows great, true poetry for me.

    I used to write a lot, I know how good it can feel. Keep doing your thing
    Jahrama - Ill$tyle Ikonz




    "Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devils schemes.

    For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love and self-discipline.

    Forget about what happened long ago! Don't think about the past. I am creating something new. There it is! Do you see it?"

    The Bible

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    Gold Member donBenito's Avatar
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    Im getting better and better, got some good ones saved up in notebook...gonna keep going
    <img src=http://postimg.org/image/t5wgmagqp/ border=0 alt= />

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    Gold Member donBenito's Avatar
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    Names of a Rose

    How were you named.
    Why did it happen.
    Who chose your name, your path.
    Your destiny.

    Were you truly ashamed.
    You grew too fast, yet remained positive.
    Your purity can always be seen in the
    perfect positions of your petals.

    And yet, at times your stems were bent
    out of shape. Stepped on, cut and abused.
    The world's cruel vindication, ignorance and negligence.

    Their misdirected treatment of your perfectly paced
    And placed Path enhanced your calm ;
    Creating a Mind like few have seen in time.
    and formed
    the furious wrath and eventual sacrifice
    of a social death. A pain like no other.
    The worse stigmas, questioning your sanity.
    Your word. Your integrity. Your worth.

    It is pain and an obstacle to be
    completely selfish but a necessary evil.
    A survivor's worth.
    A brave choice a jagged pill to swallow.
    Look what you did.
    For the preservation of your ideas.
    Your convictions.

    Their treatment created another root.
    Another stem formed.
    Another rose bloomed.
    In darkness.
    A black rose.
    Side by side with the original.
    Protecting the originals position.

    Yet your word is your bond; the basis of all meaning.
    Is the word. It creates but also destroys completely.
    In all your names. All your various stems. Branches.
    Petals and Roots.
    And incarnations.
    It is Princely.

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